As Scott and I surfed the channels of the satellite radio in our rental car this past weekend, something occurred to me: Whatever happened to the power ballad? I used to love that whatever I was feeling, there was a huge, powerful song to match. Or to listen to 327 times on repeat because I danced to it with [insert guy here I liked at the time]. They knew my teen angst. They felt my pain. Celine Dion and Mariah Carey were two my favorite power balladiers. But now, everything is a getcha-booty-movin' dance mix. WHY? Who orchestrated the death of the power ballad? I haven't bought a Celine Dion album since "A New Day Has Come" (2002). And Mariah is the worst offender. Now she's one of the one-named artists who shakes what her mama gave her (or more like what her money gave her). Why did they have to take a good thing, and all that amazing talent, and turn it into bootycall music? I don't get it. Somebody PLEASE write a new power ballad that doesn't make me ashamed to say I'm a fan.