I'm sorry, we like to contradict ourselves

WHAT is the deal?! If you're not going to allow pets at all, fine, but who are these apartment owners that say they'll allow only small dogs? What ridiculousness is this? Have you EVER met a powderpuff lap dog that didn't constantly bug you for attention, jump on everyone who comes through the door, constantly bark at unbearably high pitches, piddle on the floor and generally get in the way and be annoying? Unlike my happens-to-be-a-75-pound-German-Shepherd who is trained, both for obedience and going outside to do his business, never jumps on people and will sit, lay, stay, shake, kiss, etc. when told and is a general couch-potato. Because I understand the use of formal training and have taken my dog to it, unlike people with small dogs who think they're just cute and don't need to go to training. Such prejudice against large dogs is ridiculous. I guarantee you my dog is more well-behaved, more quiet and minds his own business more than your little mop dog. Oh, and because he's 75 pounds, can you say BIG BLADDER. He can hold it longer than I can. Oh, and he'll protect YOUR property. But no use to you. Because he's big. GET A CLUE. And rent me an apartment.